Archive for September, 2006

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EP073: Barnaby in Exile

By Mike Resnick.
Read by Paul Fischer (of The Balticon Podcast)
Discuss on our forums.
All stories by Mike Resnick.
All stories read by Paul Fischer.

“Very good, Barnaby,” she says. “And what is this?”

“Kitten,” I say.

We go through the whole book.

“Where is Barnaby?” I ask.

“Barnaby is an ape,” she says. “There is no picture of an ape in the book.”

I wonder if there are any other Barnabys in the world, and if they are lonely too.

Rated G. Contains nothing age-inappropriate. However, some listeners may find it excessively sad.

Today’s Sponsor:

Referenced sites:
2006 Podcast & Portable Media Expo

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EP072: Joe Steele

(Update 9/24: Many of you will probably get a duplicate download. This time it’s deliberate. I had requested permission to play Janis Ian’s song, “God and the FBI,” but she was touring Europe and didn’t get my e-mail in time. She just responded and graciously gave me permission, so I’m revising the file and including it at the end. If you don’t want to hear the whole story again, just skip forward 41 minutes. Thank you, Janis!)

By Harry Turtledove.
(Inspired by the song “God & the FBI” by Janis Ian, published by Windham Hill. Song included with Janis Ian’s permission.)
Read by Stephen Eley.

Two men left. Franklin D. Roosevelt. D for Delano, mind. Governor of New York. Cousin to Teddy Roosevelt. Already ran for Vice President once. Didn’t win. Cigarette holder. Jaunty angle. Wheelchair. Paralysis. Anguish. Courage. As near an aristocrat as America grows. Franklin D. Roosevelt. D for Delano.

And Joe Steele.

Joe Steele. Congressman from California. Not San Francisco. Not Nob Hill. Good Lord, no. Fresno. Farm country. That great valley, squeezed by mountains east and west. Not a big fellow, Joe Steele. Stands real straight, so you don’t notice too much. Mustache, a good-sized one. Thick head of hair just starting to go gray. Eyelids like shutters. When they go down and then come up again, you can’t see what was behind them.

Rated R. Contains profanity and strong political themes. Not happy politics, like we have today. 1930s politics.

Referenced sites:
Wikipedia: Alternate history
AlternateHistory.com
“If Lee Had Not Won the Civil War,” by Winston Churchill
Today in Alternate History (by Robbie Taylor)
Bring the Jubilee, by Ward Moore
Turtledove Wiki

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EP071: The Capo of Darkness

By Laura Resnick.
Read by Evo Terra (of The Dragon Page) and Sheila Unwin (of The Dragon Page With Class).

Eve looked startled. “You used to be in Heaven? And now you’re working for the Lord of Flies?”

“He don’t go by that title no more. He didn’t like the novel, thought it showed him in a bad light. And don’t call him ‚ÄòBeelzebub,’ neither,” I advised, figuring it wouldn’t hurt to give these underdressed kids a little help. “He’s gotten real sensitive about it. He thinks it makes him sound like a character in an English comedy.”

Rated R. Contains religious satire, gangster satire, and profanity. Not for those who take their hellfire too seriously.

Referenced sites:
Destructomundo

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EP070: Squonk the Dragon

(Technical Note: This is a corrected version of the sound file; my original one had a cut-and-paste glitch in the outro. Apologies to anyone who gets a duplicate, and thanks to Tony Mast of the Fanboy Smackdown podcast for pointing out the error.)

By Pete Butler.
Read by Stephen Eley and Anna Eley.

Squonk lived with his mother, who was definitely not a dragon–she was a small blue bird named Mrs. Tweedle-Chirp. Now, it is true that birds generally cannot lay dragon eggs, and Mrs. Tweedle-Chirp was no exception. But, they can care for dragon eggs that they happen to find lying untended in the middle of the forest, assuming they are suitably ambitious.

Rated G. This is a children’s story. Have Fun.

Referenced sites:
Variant Frequencies